Toxic Friendships
When I was a junior in high school I met a girl that I was working with. After a few months we became inseparable. We did absolutely everything together; going out to eat, going to parties together, and even going to the gym together. She became my best friend. We decided to move in with each other for college. Everything was perfect. We did everything together, we were making new friends together, and we were just happy to be together. That only lasted a few months after college started. One of our male friends started to take a liking to her and they started dating. We still did everything together, but it was now the three of us. The three of us went to parties together, went out to eat together, and even had sleepovers together. I was happy that she was happy. In November of 2022, everything went south. I was starting to get annoyed with being around them all the time because no matter what I said or did, it would be a problem to them and they would be rude to me. I would be sitting in my bed and I could hear them whispering to each other about me. Of course I would say something to them, but they would always assume that I was joking or just being mad at a “joke”. It got to the point where I did not want to be in the same room with them for weeks. I would leave my room when they would be together and go to other places. The next month they had sleepovers every night, and they were mostly in our room. Her boyfriend would stay in our room for days on end. I would wake up and he would be there. I would go to class and he would be there. I did not get any privacy. The bullying continued. I would walk into my own room to them talking about how stupid I am or how I “sleep around”. They have told me multiple times that I would never get married or even get into a relationship. I have been told that I will not do anything with my life because of how dumb I am. I was laying in bed one night and I just remember a heavy feeling in my chest because I was so frustrated and wanted to cry, but I couldn’t. I told myself that this is not okay. I had to get help. The next morning, I contacted my college’s counseling center and made an appointment to talk to someone because I could not take it anymore. I stopped eating as much because I would get told I eat too much. I stopped talking to them as much because I was afraid of what they were going to say. I cut off a lot of important people in my life because I lost myself
and had no motivation to talk to anyone. I went to my first therapy session and it made me feel better, but there are so many different things keeping me from dropping my best friend. We live together, and if I were to drop her then it would be awkward the last few months of school. She has been my best friend for years now. It is hard to cut off your best friend. What sucks most about it is that she was my best friend at one point and never insulted me in ways she knew would hurt me. I dealt with Anorexia for a while and she would make jokes about it way before I was in recovery. It is a hard thing to deal with, but I just wanted to say that just because they are your best friend does not mean that they can’t bully you. Bullying comes in multiple ways not just physical. Meet new friends. It gets better.
You Will Rise Project 